Sigh

It was a long day with Tai.  Nothing in particular, just toddler-ness and a tired momma.  Tom had a tough day too - big presentation at work.  He got beer after work, then came home.  Since we were out late at the preschool fair (damn, was that crowded and *insane*.  There were parents there with their infants!  And I thought I was starting too early...) Tai was still awake and Tom helped put him to bed.

I was feeling tired and grumpy and jealous that Tom went out for beer.  Tom came down and after spending some time on his iPhone, asked what was up with me.  I said I was feeling tired and grumpy.  He asked why.  I talked about my day.  He said:

"Well, it's your full time job now, right?"  I said it was more than full time and he asked how.  I bit my tongue and tried to explain.  The fact that I can't use the bathroom by myself.  That I'm on duty all night.  He argued with me, and blamed me for wanting to still breastfeed and night, and cosleep.  Yeah, this would be the time to discuss changing that.

Then he asked how a daycare teacher did it.  Uh - they aren't the moms of their kids.  They have the evenings and weekends off.

He tried to argue that with me too, and I cut it off.  I figured it wasn't going anywhere productive.  Which is good because he pretty much passed out on the couch about five minutes later. 

I just wish he'd try to understand where I'm coming from.  I'm not asking anything of him (other than maybe a break - like a few hours of preschool or nannyshare - which we've already got under negotiation.)  Why does everything have to be an argument?

I guess I'm worried that he's right, that other people can do this easily and I'm just whiny and lazy.  Not a way I want to see myself.